ALRIGHT.... I can't seem to bounce back to my normal happy, hyper care-free self right now. I feel really restless and something is bothering me, but I don't know what exactly. I could list off a million things that it COULD be, but I would really not be sure. I feel really trapped these days. Everything is just how it's going to be, but I want some change. I am bored.
I don't know what's wrong with me. I still havn't got my driver's licence, it's like I have a mental block on it. I'm going to try very hard in the next couple of weeks to get that done. I also havn't been to school since I went to my orientation. Yes, I am behind, but I have this odd fear of going. It sounds dumb. But I will have to get over it whether I like it or not.
ALSO regarding school...I've decided not to start college or university, or whatever, until next spring. I have a good job right now and I want to work for a while and save soem money, buy a car, and save more money to actually go to school. I really do not care what anyone else thinks of this plan. It's my plan and I like it. Besides, I'm not even close to having figured out what I want in life and I'm not wasting my time in school doing soemthing I don't like. So that's that.
I have a head ache, the glands in my neck are still swollen, not as bad as they were but enough that it's bothering me, so yes, I'm dying.
WHat I really want right this second is to cheer up. I miss my friends. But I don't have time to see them. WHat the hell.
Where did my pure happiness go??? Maybe I'm just having a bad day.
I don't know what to do...now...tomorrow...or next year. I know what I should do, what is expected of me, but that's not what I want.
Well I'm going to shut up now because I'm annoying myself with my unhappiness.
Bex